Motivation, Wherefore art thou?

I have no motivation. It has escaped me. I think I need to chase it down. Granted, I've been working my tail off for the last week, but I feel guilty. The worst part is I have 3 more weeks of my two jobs at once, then I will have a several month break from the madness. I think it's just knowing I have 3 more weeks that makes my motivation run away. And I have a guilt complex. I let everything make me feel guilty. Knowing is half the battle. But I do it anyway.

I think I need to dig down deep, especially since I really want this, and find every ounce of courage and strength I have and kick some butt. I need to realize that even though the next few weeks will be stressful, I will still feel even better if I watch what I eat and get my exercise in. So, my short-term goal for today is to drink my water, watch what I eat, and climb on the treadmill when I get off work. One day at a time.

I will praise myself because even though I am still smoking, I have significantly cut down and maintained that. I have still kept down my caffeine intake down to one caffeinated beverage a day. I did manage to get 6 1/2 hours of sleep last night, which is a huge improvement.

I have found a lot of support and encouragement in Mama Laughlin's Fit Camp on Facebook and her blog along with others I've found through her, are very motivational in themselves. I just got a treadmill Sunday and am completely stoked about it. It has just been too hot here to even think about going outside. And I ordered the 30DS online and it should be here today. I really excited about that.

So I've had a little set back this past week, but I'm not quitting. And even though I have this guilt complex, I'm talking myself out of beating myself up as I type. So, tonight...I WILL conquer the treadmill! And tomorrow when I weigh in for my first week of the 60 day fitness challenge I WILL be proud no matter the weight loss because I know I'm headed in the right direction. And long term...I WILL quit smoking. I WILL lose weight. I WILL drink more water. I WILL cut out caffeine. I WILL eat healthier. I WILL make more time to read the bible. I WILL be able to play with my kids.

I CAN and I WILL!!!! Come here motivation! We've got some work to do!!!!